The man who can't be moved
by danita3
Summary: Scott Summers, often seen as an emotionless cold hearted jerk, decides to leave the mansion after Jean cheats on him with Logan rather than deal with his feelings. He's been doing it his entire life after all. Warning: contains mentions of non-con and abuse.
1. Introduction

The man who can't be moved

Scott Summers, often seen as an emotionless cold hearted jerk, decides to leave the mansion after Jean cheats on him with Logan rather than deal with his feelings. He's been doing it his entire life after all.

**Warning: this story contains mentions of child abuse and non-consensual sexual abuse. **

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Introduction

Life often changes people… it's something that cannot be avoided sometimes. I come to think of these changes as a survival mechanism. Contrary to popular belief, I was a child once and I used to laugh and get in trouble like all kids my age did. It hasn't lasted long though. One day I woke up and I was alone in this world. Not many people know that… They all mistake me for an arrogant rich kid, Logan being the first one. He keeps calling me a Boy Scout. Huh, he doesn't know shit. Ever since I lost my parents, the happy kid I used to be slowly started disappearing. I always had to look after myself, be cautious at all times; it's a vital reason why I'm still alive to this day. So if they think I'm arrogant, they can fuck themselves. I could honestly care less.

That kid inside of me has long been buried, and rightfully so... I have seen the most hideous sides of humanity when I haven't even turned 16 years old! That ought to leave a permanent scar on someone. I sure have plenty of those. The scars I mean. Every time I look at them, I mourn inside for the innocence that was stolen from me far too soon. Everybody thinks that I have a stick up my ass. That I'm cold and I can't feel things. That's not true. I just choose to ignore my feelings. I don't even remember the last time I cried.

I learned from a very young age that people feed on power, even if it was as pathetic as abusing an 8 year old boy. Every time they managed to break me, they felt invincible, so I taught myself to salvage my dignity by distancing myself from my emotions. I was done showing weakness. Soon enough it became a habit for me, actually it became more of a way of living. I haven't even shared my deepest secrets with Jean. I fed her the sugarcoated version of things. Orphan boy gets placed in the system, gets adopted by a loving family, and the only disturbance in my life was when my powers manifested and I was being hunted down. I had to add that because the first time she saw me I was in the infirmary hanging between life and death. The only people who know the skeletons in my closet were Dr. Hank McCoy and the professor, simply because they were the ones who rescued me. The professor didn't like me keeping the truth from Jean, but I just couldn't let her feel sorry for me. The truth was that I was being abused my entire life and no one would take me.

Jean Grey though… I don't know what that woman did to me. She made me trust again; feel again, even if it was with her only, it was still a progress. Better than nothing. It was so difficult allowing myself to be vulnerable again. She knew that, and yet there she is shaking it up with Logan. I feel like she ripped my heart out with her bare hands, chewed it, and then spat it in my face.

Jean was the only light in my dark life. With her I felt like I didn't need anything from this world, like I had everything anyone could ever dream of. And now, she left me… I have no family, my students hate me, and Logan is slowly replacing me as the leader of the X-men. I'm being silently tossed out like trash. The only comfort I somewhat got is the professor's disapproval of what Jean has done. He knows what she was to me: a life line. He knows how deep my wound is, and so, he gave me his blessing to leave. I have no business staying here anymore.


	2. Chapter 1

In a school full of teenagers, news usually travelled around like forest fire, and so it was no surprise that the departure of a certain math teacher reached the wolverine's hyper sensitive ears. He soon found himself barging into the office of the school's first resident telepath.

"Chuck! Is it true that one eye is leaving the school?" The short tempered man asked for confirmation.

"That would be correct Logan" The professor's answer earned him a smirk from Logan, which according to him did not seem appropriate considering that there was no humor in the current situation.

"And that is why Jean left his sorry ass. How old is the kid again? He needs to man up and accept the reality not run off just because his girlfriend dumped him! He's too young for her anyways and has a lot of growing up to do. This latest temper tantrum proves it. Jean needs a man, not a boy"

"Age is not everything Logan, and if you knew Scott at all you would not pass your judgment on him in that manner. There are many sides to Scott and many things that you have no inkling about; therefor it is not your place to ridicule him"

Logan's eyebrows arched in disbelieve. Chuck was telling him that he didn't know Scott? He has known the jerk for over a year now. He was an obsessive, arrogant control freak! That is how you sum up Scott Summers in three words.

"Sure thing Chuck" He sarcastically replied before leaving the office and shutting the door behind him.

* * *

In the meantime, the center of the students' latest gossip bit was already packing up his belongings when Jean barged into his room in the same fashion Logan has at Xavier's office.

"What the hell Scott!" She exclaimed. Without really turning to face the seething red head, Scott acknowledged her presence.

"Well hello to you too Jean"

The cold shoulder Scott gave in response to Jean served to make her angrier as she took quick strides and stood directly in front of her Ex fiancé's face.

"What kind of game are you playing? Huh? Are you trying to make me look bad by leaving? Or you're trying to make me feel guilty?" She yelled at him, crossing her arms in front of her chest.

Scott kept a stoic face and answered.

"No. And not everything has to be about you Jean"

"Then why are you leaving Scott? Where are you gonna go?" She asked him in a softer tone this time. Scott froze for a second. He hasn't done anything this impulsive since god knows when.

"I honestly don't know where I'm heading Jean. I'll figure it out as I go. As to why I'm leaving, there's no need for my services anymore. I already found another bright math teacher to replace me. He starts next week." The level of coldness in Scott's voice shook Jean to the core. This place had been his life, how could he walk away so easily?

"What about the X-men?" Jean questioned. Scott gave her a smirk and patted her shoulder.

"I'm happy to pass the torch to Logan now" Unsure of how to respond to Scott, Jean just awkwardly stood in her place. She never thought he would strike her like that, but then again it was justified. Scott turned his back again to leave. He really didn't feel like being in the same room with her at the moment.

"You're being ridiculous Scott!" She shouted after him, but he paid no attention to her at all..

* * *

In another part of the mansion, particularly located in the ground levels of the ancient property, the weather witch was reacting to the news in her own way.

"I cannot believe Scott has behaved like this. It is not like him" She confided to the man standing in front of her, who was busy inserting updated information on his latest research project. But, even Dr. Hank McCoy was aware of this latest predicament, which was odd considering that he was confined to the sanctuary of his lab most of the time. Hank sighed. No one understood Scott like he and the professor did.

"You know Roe, Scott is human too. I feel bad for the kid and the burden he has taken upon himself, to always be the strong one and try to protect everybody. Even if it makes him look like an, excuse my choice of words, an ass. We all have our breaking points, and I think Scott just reached his. Especially when he feels unappreciated and disliked by everyone"

Ororo pondered his words a bit. It is true. She never really thought about how difficult that must've been. But still, why quit now? It is as if Hank predicted what was going on through her mind, he added a few points to his previous discussion.

"Jean was the only one that kept him here Roe, whether he likes to admit it or not. He knows his students aren't fond of him and he just doesn't know how to show love or affection. If you ask me, I think leaving the institute might be good for him. Scott built his life around people, he needs to learn to do things for himself, find himself, and value himself more. Maybe then he'll learn that there's nothing wrong with being vulnerable and allowing people past your walls sometimes"

"What about us? His friends! You and I and the professor. Do we not mean something to him?" Ororo intercepted Hank in a rare fit of anger. She felt betrayed. Her pulse was erratic and her face was flushed with heat radiating off her in waves.

"Uh, grammatically speaking it's _'You and the professor and I' " _

If looks could kill, Hank would be dead by now. As smart as Hank was, his social skills weren't that great. Judging by the murderous glare he was currently getting from his female team mate now was not the time to correct someone's grammar. The gentle beast gave her time to cool down a bit before ending their discussion with one last sentence.

"Scott wouldn't leave us if he felt that we needed him Roe. While he loves us all dearly, there is a lot of hurt in his soul that neither of us can heal"

* * *

Later in the afternoon, Scott headed to class to announce his departure to his students. Even though he was sure they already knew. Upon his entrance the chaotic noises vibrating through the classroom walls stopped.

"Well, at least this time I didn't have to tell you guys to be quiet" Scott said, pulling his chair and sitting in front of 30 young and curious mutants.

"Tomorrow you will all be meeting your new math teacher. His name is professor Sebastian Willows. He has more experience than I do, a stronger educational background than mine, and he is very smart. I believe that he will be a great addition to this school. I'm also expecting all of you to make him feel welcomed, alright?"

The students silently nodded.

"Oh, and another thing. Seeing as I will be busy moving out and your new teacher will be busy moving in, this week's classes are suspended. Don't worry though; we're already ahead of all the other schools so it shouldn't be a problem. Tomorrow you'll just meet professor Willows and get to know him"

Scott was met with silent nods again and a few whispers of "Ok" and "Yes Mr. Summers" .

"Good. Anyone has any question for me?"

The students glanced at each other, each contemplating whether they should ask the question they're dying to know the answer to or just forget about. Until one girl put them out of their misery by raising her hand.

"Yes Marla? What would you like to know?"

The shy girl took a deep breath. She wasn't fond of being the center of attention, but right now she couldn't care less.

"Why are you leaving us Mr. Summers?"

Out of all the kids in this class, Marla was the least expected to be so daring. She usually kept to herself and had very few friends. Not to mention that she was a bit socially anxious.

"Sometimes we need exciting changes in our life, Marla. I have been in the institute for ten years, and I never really took the time to discover new things out there or find myself. Believe it or not, the school always came first to me. And you guys might not believe this too but, I care an awful lot about you kids. It's true I have been pushing you, but I only wanted you to be the best. Look at us! Ahead of all the other schools and scoring best grades in exams. Even the ones who were struggling came through and did a fantastic job" Scott said, giving Marla a wink.

He remembered clearly the late nights he would spend with her. She was so embarrassed that she understood things slower than the rest of her class. Every time she came to see him Scott would try his best to explain math to her, but her fear and insecurity about her intelligence created a strong barrier that kept her from learning. She was convinced that she was stupid and she would never get it, but Scott believed in her. He told himself that he would not stop tutoring her until she got good grades, even though there were times where Marla felt like giving up, he wouldn't let her.

"Just start by believing that you can do it, and then it will all become easier" He would say to her. Now, Marla recently became one of his best students.

While Scott focused on delivering his speech, the far back of the class was engaged in its own conversations. Jubilee clicked her tongue while leaning casually in her seat. She then took a pencil, using it to nudge Rouge on her side therefore catching her attention.

"_What?_" Rouge whispered in a harsh tone looking clearly upset that her friend broke her concentration.

"_He is so lying to us_" Jubilee whispered back, her words reaching the ears of Bobbi and Kitty who were sitting right behind her and Rouge. Curiosity made them lean closer to hear everything Jubilee currently knew about the situation.

"_He is totally leaving because his precious Jean cheated on him_" That piece of information shocked her friends immensely. They were the school's "It" couple! They were supposed to get married!

"_With who? And how do you know it's true?_" Kitty asked.

"_With the Wolverine, and I know its true cause Mr. Summers emptied his room and he had an altercation with Jean. Also wolf man has been tip toeing around the red head and bein all awkward and stuff_"

"Back row, when you are done discussing my private life, let me know so I can resume this class" Scott suddenly announced.

Embarrassed by being called out in front of everyone, Jubilee blushed a deep red and stopped talking.

"Ok. So I'm almost out of the way finally, then you will all get to party like rock stars. Just hear me out for a few minutes" Scott joked. All of his students were laughing but the exception of Marla, who was currently frowning.

"I tried to be fair as much as I could and treat everyone the same. If I ever wasn't fair against any of you, I ask you to forgive me. Contrary to popular belief I'm not a robot, I do make mistakes" Scott's sincerity was starting to get to his students. They were all focused on him now, trying to resist the sudden sadness they were experiencing.

"I know I'm not your favorite teacher in the world. All rules, no fun, and strict as a sergeant in a military drill. But that's only inside class or missions. We cannot get distracted during our missions. If anything were to happen to any of you under my watch I would never have been able to forgive myself. I would die slowly on the inside. It would eat at me. It would kill me.."

It was unfamiliar to the kids to watch Scott be so vulnerable and wear his heart out for everyone else to see. It made them feel absolutely horrible about all the times they made fun of him or wished he would just leave. But they were just kids. They didn't know better. They didn't know how deeply their teacher cared about them.

"I remember at one point tucking each and every one of you to sleep when the night mares got so bad, or having heartfelt conversations about how awful people can be sometimes. It's funny, I feel like a parent at 25 but I'm not complaining. When I was your age I wish I had someone to talk to, someone to go to when life had its way with me, but I didn't. It was a terrible feeling, and I tried to give back what I didn't have as a kid growing up. So that none of you would go through this feeling at all"

The young mutants felt ashamed of themselves. Going through their teen years they only cared about those who bowed to their demands. They forgot all about those who dried their tears and helped them stand up on their feet when they were little. The youth often believe themselves to be invincible, and that was why a lot of them stopped coming to Scott for help once they hit puberty. They all knew though that Scott would always be there for them. No one questioned it, they just forgot it.

As all the memories of long sleepless nights came back to the class, Marla stood up and bolted out of the class, not willing to accept that her teacher was leaving.

"Marla!" Scott called after her but to no avail. She wouldn't listen to him. She was clearly upset. It tugged at Scott's heart strings to see her upset. She is such a sweet girl, but he already made a decision and arrangements were made as well.

"Class dismissed" Scott ended his class and quietly left. The students were stunned for a moment before they packed up and left as well.

* * *

Scott found himself standing outside Marla's room. He knocked on her door gently and he was met with red rimmed eyes and a stuffy nose staring right back at him.

"Marla" The math teacher uttered her name in a soft tone, hoping to soothe her.

"I don't wanna talk to you" She whimpered and tried to close the door, but Scott held it open with both his hands.

"Marla please.. tell me what's wrong" He tried prompting her to open up to him.

"You're just like all the other teachers! You don't really care about our wellbeing and how good we do, you just wanna get your paycheck and get your classes out of your way"

Her words stung, but Scott knew a wounded person will try to release frustration by inflicting pain.

"That's not really fair Marla" Scott replied patiently.

"Then why are you leaving us? Why are you giving up on us? When I was struggling you were the only one who believed in me when no one else did. What changed?"

"I only showed you the ropes Marla. You had it in you all along. You did the heavy lifting, it was all you. I'm so proud of you"

Scott was suddenly interrupted by a strong hug from Marla. He patted her back slowly as she started sobbing against his chest.

"You know Marla; I think you're about the only person who's going to miss me in this place" Scott absent mindedly remarked, and it just so happened that a passing by Rouge had caught on what he said. It made her heart bleed to hear him say that, and at the same time fury built inside of her against someone she never thought she'd be mad at: Logan.

* * *

(A/N): This chapter is all about how I truly believe Scott's character is like. I hope I did him justice. I always felt like he was misunderstood. What I was aiming towards was showing that sometimes strength can be a weakness. I also hate that some Marvel fans describe Scott as whiny and bitter and over all a horrible person, so I tried to erase those associations. I'll be honest here, I don't know where I'm going with this fic. The ideas are building up as I go, but for now I have no clear direction. Any help would be more than welcomed .


	3. Chapter 2

**The man who can't be moved**

**Chapter two**

Scott never did announce when he was leaving, and he preferred it that way. He just wanted to slip out undetected and without anyone noticing. He wanted to save everyone the effort of faking sadness or feeling the obligation to bid him farewell. Well, might as well do it tonight when everybody least expected it.

"Sounds like a plan". He commended himself.

After doing a lot of soul searching throughout the day, Scott came to the realization that he barely remembered his life prior to the orphanage. Even the plane crash that claimed the life of his family was a distant and foggy memory. He knew though, that as a kid he idolized his father. From what little Scott can remember, his father had been a pilot stationed in Alaska. This tiny piece of information he knew of sparked a new sense of purpose for him: Join the air forces in Alaska. Maybe then he could find more about who he was and where he came from.

Decision made, Scott went to retrieve his suitcases from the guestroom he was currently occupying while making sure he was quiet as possible. He almost succeeded hadn't he bumped into Ororo on his way out.

"Going somewhere?" The beautiful African woman asked him, crossing her arms in front of her chest and glaring intensely at Scott after she noticed the suitcases he was dragging along with him.

"I just wanted to..uh.." Scott stumbled. He was caught red handed. It was pointless to lie.

"I understand that you've been hurt Scott, but I thought you would've at least considered our feelings by telling us when you were leaving so we can get the chance to say goodbye. But instead, you have decided to sneak out in the middle of the night like some sleazy criminal". She was clearly upset. Her voice was tainted with disappointment and hurt.

Scott couldn't blame her. He would feel the same if someone he considered to be a dear friend did that to him.

"You're right. I'm really sorry 'Ro. I just.. I didn't want any dramatic displays or awkwardness. I'm not used to being the center of attention like that." He tried explaining his hasty decision.

"Why do you shy away from love, Scott?" The ex-goddess genuinely asked him, meeting his eyes with a look bordering heart break.

For a moment the question hung in the air. So heavy and so sudden that Scott felt paralyzed, like he had been thrown into a lake of frozen water. His lungs wouldn't draw air; chills ran down his spine, electrifying his nervous system as he felt a small tremor rush through his body all in a matter of seconds. It was a harmless question, yet it took him by surprise and engulfed his mind in a thick fog. Willing himself to snap back to reality, he got over the initial shock of the question and answered Ororo truthfully.

"I dared to love Jean haven't I? And look at how that ended"

Ororo sighed in frustration and proceeded to press her point.

"I was not referring to Jean, Scott. I was referring to me, the professor, and Hank. You push us away. You won't tell us what bothers you, you won't let us worry about you, and you won't accept any kind of help from anyone.

Do you hate yourself so much to deny it from affection? Do you hate yourself that much that you think nobody would love you? Or are you afraid of losing something?"

Scott felt trapped. He didn't know how to navigate his way out of this conversation. It was clear from his body language how uncomfortable he was. It was evident in the way he was averting Ororo's eyes, tapping his foot restlessly, and fidgeting. Still, the African beauty wasn't going to let him off that easy.

"Even Jean, who you proclaim to love, has not seen your weaker side. I just wish I knew why you're so cruel on yourself! God knows you deserve happiness as much as anyone in this mansion, if not more.

You may find it to be safe the way you are now Scott, but you will never truly be happy. Ask yourself, the walls you keep raising up are they worth your suffering? You might think you're strong and tough for locking up your feelings, but I just think that those who dare to get hurt are stronger than you.

They risked more.. While you haven't risked anything"

She could tell that she hit him where it hurt, but in her defense he needed a wakeup call, even if it required a little bit of toughness from her part.

"If this journey is indeed a new beginning for you, don't make the same mistakes again Slim"

She gave him a sad smile that held her silent blessings. As she turned to leave, Scott pulled her back in his direction. To Ororo's surprise he gave her a strong hug that conveyed his deep appreciation.

"Thank you". He whispered next to her ear. She patted his back, trying to fight off the tears. Ororo wished things didn't end this way, she hated losing a friend. All she can do now though, is hope he finds what he's looking for.

* * *

"Scott left? Why hasn't he told us when he was leaving?" Jean asked in confusion. She found out the very next morning like the rest of the mansion has, but the exception of Ororo of course.

"He did not want a fuss surrounding him" Ororo explained.

All the teachers and X-men members were currently gathered in the professor's office discussing this latest turn of events.

"You knew and you didn't tell us?" Jean accusingly directed her question towards her team mate. The Ex-goddess found it rather funny that Jean, of all people was being judgmental towards her.

"It was not my place to tell, and I almost missed his departure. I ran into him by coincidence when I couldn't sleep and went out to breathe some fresh air."

"_Or it simply might have been a gut feeling". _Her mind added. Her mind also reminded of a small little detail that was currently poking her upper leg.

"Professor, I found this on Scott's bed. It is addressed to you". She handed her mentor an envelope that was resting in one of the pockets of her pencil trousers.

The sad British man opened the letter and started reading it out loud

"Dear professor X..

I'm sorry I left like this. I'm just over whelmed with everything and I didn't need the pressure of formalities. I hope you can forgive me. I couldn't leave though without telling you how grateful I am for everything you have done for me, even if my latest stunt doesn't seem to convey that"

The professor sighed. He didn't doubt Scott's loyalty; he just wished his boy would've given him the chance to express his gratitude back. He wanted to tell Scott in person how proud he was of him. He wanted to give his boy a nice reminder to hold on to before he left so he can shift his focus a bit away from the negative turn his life took.

Getting his attention back on the piece of paper he held in his hands, the professor continued reading:

"I would also like to say I'm sorry if at any point I hurt any of you or made you feel like I didn't acknowledge your support and friendship.

Hank, you always understood me when no one else could and without words needing to be voiced. I know you always had my back and I can't tell you how much this means to me.. Sappy huh? You bastards sure know how to beat it out of a man"

The occupants of the room smiled. Partially because it sounded funny when the professor read it, and partially because they welcomed a little humor break with all the stress surrounding the situation. All but Jean and Logan that is.

"Ororo.. When my head is too far up my ass, you're always the woman for the job. You pull me back to my senses and make me tone it down a notch. I thank you for that. You are a valuable gem in people's lives"

Ororo grinned. It was nice to see Scott in a playful mood. She'd almost forgotten he had one.

"Finally: my fellow X-men. I trust you that are more than capable of protecting the future of human-mutant Co-existence. It was an honor for me to work besides you.

Rouge, you are brave and fierce and you have blossomed into an independent spirit that can't be held back. You are the definition of strength even if you don't seem to think so. Believe me, I'm not one to flatter.

Bobby and Kitty, take care of your team members. Always look after each other and never screw over a partner. You're each other's family now.

As for the rest of my team members, thank you for all the times you had my six in battle and to all the contributions you have offered to mutant kind.

Be well,

Scott Summers"

The professor finished reading and folded the piece of paper gently.

"That's it?" Jean asked.

"I believe that was all Jean" Professor X answered.

"You really expected him to include you in his letter Jean? What were you expecting him to say?" Ororo commented on Jean's ridiculous question.

"I know I hurt him, a lot. But he can't treat me like I never meant something to him or didn't even exist in his life. Truth is we were going to break it off sooner or later. Things just went cold between us.

That doesn't mean I don't care about him, I still do.. after all we've been together for eight years!"

"Are you kidding me?"

Everyone's eyes shifted to the person openly expressing their irritation. To their surprise, it was none other than Rouge.

"Stay out of this kid" Logan whispered to her.

"No!" she pulled away from him and her face contorted in anger and disbelief.

"Actually I want you to listen to this too Logan.

Both of you are so high up your horses like you did nothing wrong! All of us can see that professor Summers was trying! And heck we even felt sorry for him because we knew Jean had her mind already set on Logan. So don't you dare use this as an excuse.

You didn't even put in the effort to fix your relationship. If anything this was the obstacle you needed to get over to make your band stronger. Relationships are always tested, but they will never work if only one person was trying.

You were selfish Jean"

"no pun intended" Bobby joked on the side.

"I heard that!" Rouge seethed at him and he just lowered his head in embarrassment.

"Do you know what you were doing? I'll tell you what.

Scott is legit, stable, and he's everything a girl could ever ask for. Logan is the thrill, the excitement. You wanted both. That's why you kept it a secret.

Well Jean, you can't have everything. You should've realized that and took a decision instead of shattering someone's heart to pieces. At least he would've had a little respect for you if you'd come clean.

As for you Logan, wow. I never thought you'd settle for being a rebound, a second choice, or just being used like that. You both make me sick"

Rouge unloaded on the Wolverine and his red headed mistress. The weight of her words created a heavy silence as the rest of the listeners were digesting what she said. Although rouge was out of line in her approach, the professor and Ororo were secretly satisfied from the inside. The southern girl did well. She was so wise for her age.

"Alright, everyone is dismissed" Charles Xavier announced.

Everybody went their separate directions except for the Wolverine who was tailing behind Rouge.

"Hey kid! Where did all that come from? I thought we had each other's backs" He exclaimed.

Rouge turned to look him straight in the eye and she explained why she suddenly switched sides.

"You were never around when I needed someone, Professor Summers was. Even though I treated him like dirt in the beginning because of the influence of your personality on me back when I drained your powers.

He's not the way you think he is. If you had bothered to learn more about him you'd be ashamed of yourself for judging him like that."

Suddenly without any warnings or indications, tears started flowing down her pale cheeks. Logan was taken back. There was something more to the situation than Rouge was letting on.

"Calm down kid. Take it easy. I can tell there's something more that's bothering you. I'm sorry I wasn't around.. please Marie, tell me what's wrong"

The girl suddenly started openly sobbing and Logan grabbed her gently and placed her head on his chest, soothing her and rubbing circles behind her back.

"I can't sleep.. ever since one of our missions we ventured to a month ago" she whispered.

"What happened?" Logan urged her to talk. Genuinely concerned and just hating to see the sweet girl he came to know and admire in any kind of pain.

"we were outnumbered. During battle professor Summers' visor broke. We barely managed to defeat the troops and as we were heading out, the building was falling apart and our pathway got blocked. Jean was too weak to use her telekinesis, Kitty could only save herself, and Bobby's powers weren't gonna help us. Ororo and Hank were guarding the jet, and Professor X was using Cerebro to sense any intruders. That left me and Professor Summers" Rouge sniffed and collected herself as she carried on with retelling the events of that horrendous day.

"If we used Professor Summers' powers with their full velocity, we would be buried under the rubble. We needed enough power the clear our pathway, but not cause the roof to fall over our heads. He couldn't control his powers without his visor. So I suggested that I drain his, since I could most probably control it and get us out of there. He was extremely against it and kept insisting there was another way. It was strange how strongly he objected to that solution considering the circumstances" Rouge shuddered.

"At that time I thought he was scared of me, or scared that something might happen to him because of my powers. I was so hurt and mad at him and I thought he was a pathetic selfish coward. Eventually we all pushed him to agree because all of our lives depended on it and time was running out" The southern girl suddenly went silent, trying to reign in her emotions before continuing.

"I touched him.. and I got sucked into his previous life. It was so horrible, like a black hole or a grip of death that you couldn't escape. I was drowning so fast in his mind and in his memories, like quick sand that swallows you whole and wouldn't let go. I thought I'd never get out.. that both of us would never get up, until Bobby pulled me away" As much as Rouge tried to control her feelings, she started sobbing again. Logan slowly rocked her back and forth, whispering soft spoken words and telling her that it's ok.

"I barely managed to concentrate and get us out of there. After that I collapsed and Professor Summers didn't wake up until two days later. I acted as if nothing happened. I wanted him to keep his dignity and his pride. I could tell he was so ashamed of his past life, he never wanted anyone to know about it. But I didn't only know about it, I felt it.. I lived it..

Every night I would get violent nightmares where I'm getting hit, starved, and sexually assaulted. I can't talk to anyone, and the memories just won't go away. It feels so real.. I can't take it anymore.

The worst is that endless despair and grave sadness that you'd never think a child is capable of feeling. Logan, there were days where he just surrendered to death, but he wouldn't die and he'd start crying because he's not dead yet. At times I felt like doing the same because my mind is jumbled. Sometimes I think that's my reality not his.."

Logan was speechless. It must've been hell for Marie to experience violence without actually being subjected to it. A part of him was pissed at One-eye for not making sure the kid was ok, but Marie had just told him that she convinced him she hadn't seen anything. Still, he should've made sure.

"I'm so sorry kid. No one should ever go through that. You are so brave and selfless, but you should've gotten help. Especially now that it's making you contemplate suicidal thoughts. I'm telling Chuck and I don't want to hear a word of objection from you" the short Canadian slowly steered the distraught girl back to the Professor's office.

"You should know, Professor Summers did check on me a couple of times. But I kept shrugging him off. I've never seen him broken. It was disturbing.. I was so used to the fearless leader act, but now I know he's just a scared kid like most of us are" Rouge added

Logan mentally agreed. It was so easy to forget that jackass was only 25. He suddenly felt bad for him. It couldn't have been easy to feel responsible for everyone. If it were Logan, he'd feel suffocated. Except.. it is actually Logan's responsibility to look after the school now.

"_That son of a bitch.. He fucked me over before he left. I can't be tied down like this!". _The wolverine grunted at that bitter thought. Momentarily lost in his resolve, he didn't notice the office door open.

"Come on in child. Thank you Logan, I'll take it from here" Charles addressed Logan and accompanied Rogue inside. After making sure Marie was safe, the Canadian stomped across the school to reach the gardens. He needed a cigar, this has been one hell of a day.

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**(A/N): lots of heavy emotions in this chapter huh? Well hopefully the next one would be more of a spiritual journey. Please leave reviews and let me know of your expectations. I love seeing readers' fantasies. Until next time loves xoxo.**


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